
Pirate
Dear family and friends, I have given in to the call of the sea and run away to become a pirate. I am headed to the hearty Caribbean to seek my fame and fortune, maties. I've got almost everything I need to complete my pirate kit. I've got a hat, a sword and a black flag with a skull on it. All I need now is to find someplace to get a used parrot on the cheap. I'm even prepared for emergencies since it seems pirates are susceptible to on the job injuries. I've got my eye patch (just in case) and a peg for my leg (just in case) and a hook (just in case).
Is it me or do Pirates have a really bad health care plan? I can see handing the pharmacist your AAAARGHFLAK card:
Cap'n Mikey: "What's this? The prescription says I need eye drops."
Pill Slinger Bill: "Drops aren't covered. This is an eye patch."
Cap'n Mikey: "What if I needed a splint for a broken finger?"
Pill Slinger Bill: "Not covered. We would have to fit you with a hook."
Cap'n Mikey: "Corrective shoes?"
Pill Slinger Bill: "Peg leg."
Cap'n Mikey: "I see. Asthma?"
Pill Slinger Bill: "Eye patch."
Cap'n Mikey: "Makes perfect sense. Rash?"
Pill Slinger Bill: "Look, on your coverage all you can get is an eye patch, hook or peg."
Cap'n Mikey: "So if I bring you a prescription for monkey knuckle ointment you are going fit me with a hook instead?"
Pill Slinger Bill: "Didn't you read the information in your pirate's handbook before you signed up for it? Patch, hook or peg-- Those are your only options."
Cap'n Mikey: "What do I get if I come in with a prescription for Viagra?
Bad health plan an all I plan to set sail for the balmy Carribean, so AVAST ye chuckleheads! Heave to and prepare to be boarded, for it's a pirates life for me!

Yoho
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