An epic hours in the making!
"The One Where Dax Throws The Burgers"
A tribute to that great patriot Dax Flame, this video shows why you should never invite Dax to a cookout. It is also the only place you can see Dax Flame and Osama Bin Laden in the same video.
(I was eating cheese when I made this. Isn't that ironic?)
Victoria Rose peeked over my shoulder. "Are you picking on that kid again?" She asked disapprovingly. I grinned sheepishly and muttered an excuse as if I had just been caught giving the poor kid a Wet-Willy or Super-Atomic Wedgie.
I wouldn't even say I'm picking on him. I'm making important social commentary on a highly recognizable cultural phenomenon. I mean, c'mon... He's one of the most downloaded YouTards of all time. He's putting himself out there for all to see and comment on. It's as if he's saying, "Hello World, I'm Dax Flame poke me in the eye with a sharp stick!"
Besides, he's not even a real kid. He's some wannabe actor named Dax Patrello, or some sort of animatronic robot built by the Disney Imagineers. Why, I bet in a year or two we'll see Dax Flame added to the Hall of Presidents.
If he is just really some immature, misguided schmo, then where are his parents? Why do they let him post his tantrums on the Internet without any kind of supervision? Shouldn't they be aware of what he's up to and provide him with a little guidance, considering he's obviously a special-needs child? (I'm sure that there are people in cyberspace who wish him more ill than my little spoofs will ever cause.)
And it isn't just Dax I'm lampooning. Like the low-brow entertainments that the ancient masses clamored for even as Rome fell, fascination with Dax and those like him have become our modern bread and circuses. Does the rise of Dax Flame portend the end of Western Civilization? Probably not, but it is a pretty good indication that as a society we're getting stoopider by the minute.
I've still got a couple of Dax Flame videos in the works before I completely run out of gas on this kid and move on to something more interesting. The first is a 1984 mashup with Dax as Big Brother.
The second is a take-off on all those "sponsor-a-child" charities.
Yes, for just pennies a day you too can sponsor a youtarded child like Dax...
Dax is one distrubing kid; LMAO @ the Credits. From now on keep the "Tehutivision" and the "I don't eat chesse" sound bite. Good one.
Posted by: Falconmyst | May 08, 2007 at 02:49 PM
LMAO!
I believe I have actually heard my Grandmother express the same cheese-hating sentiments! Great film, Tehuti.
Posted by: Mercy | May 25, 2007 at 02:15 PM
holy shit this the greatest video ever editied
btw i am a huge dax fan. we go way back.
Posted by: Eric | December 18, 2007 at 09:48 PM