Resmart

The hottest thing on YouTube these days is Dax Flame, a.k.a. Bernice Juach III, a.k.a. Dax Patrello. As of this post he's YouTube's #1 subscribed contributor this month, 43rd most subscribed of all time, with 13952 subscribers (of which, sadly, I am one) and 750,985 channel views. This kid will probably be president someday.

It is the beginning of the end of Western Civilization.

For better or worse, at least for the next fifteen minutes, Dax Flame is an honest-to-goodness cultural Icon.

Like the car wreck we can't look away from, Dax keeps posting videos and we keep watching, and wondering, "What's wrong with this kid?" Some have suggested that Dax suffers from autism or Asperger's Syndrome, or that perhaps good old fashioned retardation has reared its ugly head. Dax, however disputes these armchair diagnoses and claims to be perfectly normal. Watch a few of his videos and decide for yourself.

Others believe that "Dax Flame" is just a character in some sort of Internet theater of the absurd. After watching a handful of his videos I'm inclined to agree. I think that in a few weeks when his numbers start to drop off he'll come out with an "I pwnd YouTube" video ridiculing those gullible souls who logged on week after week to give him advice or make fun of him. I think we are watching the Borat of YouTube at work.

His antics have garnered him a mention on G4's "Attack of The Show" where Hosts Kevin Pereira and Olivia Munn trashed his "Tapeface" video. Dax later vlogged that his appearance on TV was not as enjoyable as he might have hoped. Don't feel bad, kid. I submitted a piece to one of their contests and it didn't even merit a mention. Hey Dax, If we ever corner Kevin Pereira in a dark alley, I'll block him and you swipe him, OK?

Assuming that this isn't completely scripted and Dax isn't the victim of some mental deficiency or developmental disorder, what is his major malfunction? Perhaps like the Numa Numa Guy and the Star Wars Kid before him, Dax suffers from Internet Dumbass Syndrome. But now, through the miracle of modern medicine, there's hope. Please enjoy the educational video I made on I.D.S. and new treatments available for the first time:

I've been submitting this video as a response to every new Daxflame video that the kid has posted, but so far he has not approved it. I even sent him a private message asking why:

Dax,

As I'm sure you know, there is much speculation as to whether or not "Bernice Juach" aka "Daxflame" is a real person or a cleverly developed character like Borat. Whatever the truth, Daxflame is an honest-to-goodness cultural icon (at least for the next 15 minutes.) Acknowledging that fact, I've created a little video sending up your videos and all the other Numa Numa guys and Star Wars Kids out there, as well as the rest of us who can't look away. I've submitted it as a video response to a number of your vlogs, but you have not approved it. Yet you consistently approve videos that are much more derogatory and insulting. What gives?

If you are planning an "I pwned YouTube" video down the road, don't worry. I have no intention of calling you out. If you really are the Borat of YouTube it shouldn't matter if I want to poke a little gentle fun at the character.

If you are a real kid (with real issues)then you should know that I was as goofy and geeky at 15 as you appear to be in your videos. It is a good thing that they didn't have YouTube when I was your age. (Man, it's a good thing they didn't have YouTube.) You went to school dressed as Superman-- I wore my Star Trek uniform shirt (often) and had the bruises to prove it. (Check out my "These Are The Voyages" video.)

The danger here is that you'll take my little video jab personally and it will hurt your feelings. That is not my intention. The key to survival in this cruel world is a sense of humor, and if we don't laugh at ourselves the rest of the world will laugh at us anyway. I would rather be in on the joke than be the butt of it, wouldn't you? Just don't take my video as a personal stab at you-- I'm sending up Daxflame the Internet phenom, not Bernice Juach (or Dax Patrello) the person. Heck, mash up some of my little videos if you want to respond. I promise I'll approve anything you submit.

Tehuti

Now what could be more fair than that? 

For those of you who were tickled by my little Resmart bit and want more, here is an 8.5 x 11 downloadable PDF of the above print ad. And for you really hard-core types, here is a link to brand new RESMART T-shirts from CafePress.

Comments

[Falconmyst]

I watched more videos of this kid than I should have; distrubing is me watching them. I don't think you and I both equaled the weirdness of this kid. Having worked with mentally challenged individuals for eight years I think this guy is just a strange "act" who has gotten a following and continues on the roll. Sorry, little toooo weird for me

[Falconmyst]

LOL LOL I laughed myself silly at the RESMART vid; see, folks, now THAT's worth an award!

[Nick Oldroyd]

Great blog dude...I just watched that DaxFlame video again and I love it when he sings about chocolate sause...Sorry but I like him and everything but what a dumbass lol...Have a great day dude.

[Tie-dyed Tehuti]

I sent this private message to Dax Flame:

If I submit my "Resmart" video again are you gonna approve it? I've seen you approve much more insulting videos, and I'm only trying to spoof you in a good natured way. Besides, I poke no more fun at your awkward geekiness than I do at my own when I was your age. Check out, "These Are The Voyages" for instance. I was the kid who wore my Star Trek uniform shirt to Jr High. I'm calling you out kid, show you're a sport and approve my RESMART video. Post a video response to it if you like. I'll approve anything you submit. If you are for real and not just the Borat of YouTube, then we are more alike than you realize. You've also got to know that if you keep putting yourself out there, people are going to respond, and it isn't always going to be positive. The best thing you can do is learn to laugh at yourself. It takes the sting out when others laugh at you. The good-natured ability to laugh at your own foibles will carry you far in life.

Just a head's up-- I plan on making at least two more videos goofing on you. And I don't mean to hurt your feelings or be mean-- It's like William Shatner's roast. You get all your closest friends together to make awful jokes at each other's expense, but it is all in good fun. Understand?

All the best,

Tehuti

He responded with a single word: "NO."

Then he blocked me. What's he so afraid of?

I AM THE ANTIDAX!

[Smokey (Smoke2joint5)]

I sent DaxFlame a PM telling him to approve the RESMART video saying that loads of people love him and his work and that the RESMART video is not making fun of him, but mainly a spoof of his character (real or fake)...He replied simply:

You are nice, but I didn't used to think so.

I have no idea what this means...Maybe he fancies me (yuck!)...Can't wait for the next two spoofs dude, I bet they will be great...Keep up the good work

[Tie-dyed Tehuti]

May the blessings of the Dax be upon you! Congratulations on being dubbed "Nice" and having your M.F.E.* Restored. Thank you for speaking on my behalf. Perhaps someday I'll be granted honorary nice status.

*(Member Flamian Empire)

[Smokey (Smoke2joint5)]

You are welcome dude...Hopefully if I keep pestering him he might accept it...Until then he is a fool! lol...Have a great week Tehuti...Oh by the way I checked out one of you radio broadcasts online...I don't think it was a live one maybe pre-recorded...really enjoyed your views...Keep up the great work